CEOs and Office Hos (or what I missed in college)

I read an article today in the WSJ on the sexual activity taking place on college campuses and how it keeps people from finding meaningful relationships.

"Now, in addition to all of the other coarse behavior on college campuses, students can look forward to parties with themes like "CEOs & Office Hos," "Golf Pros & Tennis Hos" and "Millionaires & Maids" at schools around the country. I'd be surprised if students haven't already added Politicians & Prostitutes to their list of weekend possibilities, with the Eliot Spitzer scandal fresh on their minds."

Donna Freitas writes that her research shows that most students do not appreciate this kind of activity on their college campus and are not satisfied with their own behavior when it comes to dating, romance and sex.

The article has alot of data in it, but it boils down to this: If a community does not support environments that promote meaningful connections with members of the opposite sex, we should not expect many people will find meaningful relationships on their own.

Sadly, we forget experiencing our true sexuality happens when we trust in the One who created sex and experience it as He intended . Yes, God is pro-sex.

Sometimes I think those of us in the church take for granted the teaching we have received on purity and the benefits it offers our lives. I was a virgin when I was married, and when I grew up we didn't have True Love Waits, purity pledges or jewelery. In fact we didn't talk much nearly as much about sex in my high school group as I do to the students that meet in my home Wednesday night. And even thought following god's plan for purity was hard, i admit my mind wasn't always pure regardless of what my body didn't do, I am really glad I followed that path. After 15 years of marriage I can say God knows what He is doing!

Freitas describes students in her course on modesty eating up books by Josh Harris (I Kissed Dating Goodbye) and Lauren Winner (Real Sex). These students who had never been presented with the concept of intentional purity were blown away that people really saved themselves, and they found these ideas refreshing (and somewhat unbelievable).

So for those of you who are tired of messages about waiting until you are married, remember that there are many who have never hear an encouraging word about the power of purity. They have never had anyone encourage them to be virtuous, and they admit to feeling "dirty," "used," "regretful," "empty," "miserable," "disgusted," "ashamed," "duped" and "abused". As youth workers we don't always present it right, but the wisdom of our sexuality presented in scripture is powerful.

Next time you are sharing about your faith, maybe we should also share the satisfaction we find in living a life of purity. Sometimes what we want, isn't what we need.

What do you think?

Mark

PS. For those of you who feel you've already gone too far, God's plan for purity includes you too! God's word not only shows us how to walk the right path, but also how to find the path again when we wander off. Don't feel you can't experience the life God offers, Jesus died for our imperfections and impurities because we can't do it on our own. Need help? Just ask